Actual Freedom ~ Frequently Asked Questions

Frequently Asked Questions

Sex Without Libido?

Richard claims that he just prefers to have the company of a woman instead of being alone. That it [the company of a woman] is a privilege etc. But the very fact that he would consider it a privilege, that is, something which adds value to his life, belies the claim that the world is perfect as is for an actualist.

But is not the sex drive an instinct? Where do you draw the line between the ‘instincts’, and the emotions you enjoy? Forgive me if I’ve missed these points previously.

I wouldn’t say that eschewing women is a proof that one is free, but being attached to women is a sure proof that one is enchained. The Buddha (I know you don’t like him but I do) says: ‘So long as the lustful desire of a man for a woman, however small, is not destroyed, so long is that man in bondage, like a calf that drinks milk is to its mother. (The Dhammapada). So your wouldn’t mind at all if your wife slept with other men every day and spent most of her time with them?

I have serious doubts as to whether Peter, Vineeto and Richard are free from the need for sexual congress. Because you are indulging in it ... You are indulging in sexual intercourse, I meant. Hence, any claim that you are free of the desire for sexual intercourse would have to withstand close scrutiny (which would not be required if you were living a celibate life). You consider it a privilege to live with an as-is-accepting woman, with whom you have sex. But why they choose a life of heterosexual co-existence instead of a solitary life? Because he wouldn’t need it, and involving another person (who is most likely not free of the human condition) in one’s life is going to involve conflicts, fights, struggles for space, etc. I mean why would one want to live in a fish market instead of around a peaceful garden?

Were all three people in the three-way relationship with Irene, yourself and Grace engaging in sexual relations (i.e. were Irene and Grace sexually active together, etc.)? 2) Was there any hint that Irene may have been jealous of your sexual relationship with Grace? 3) Why, if you had a ‘perfect’ relationship with Irene, would you want to add a third party? I don’t remember this being covered thoroughly in past correspondence and now that I think about it, that is rather surprising to me.

Were all three people in the three-way relationship with Irene, yourself and Grace engaging in sexual relations (i.e. were Irene and Grace sexually active together, etc.)? 2) Was there any hint that Irene may have been jealous of your sexual relationship with Grace? 3) Why, if you had a ‘perfect’ relationship with Irene, would you want to add a third party? I don’t remember this being covered thoroughly in past correspondence and now that I think about it, that is rather surprising to me. * Sorry, I cannot follow. When it fits into your case you support it with ‘the norm’ but otherwise the norm is just abnormal for you (= human Condition).

What interests me most about this ‘condition’ is how life is actually experienced. In your case, you have expressed some hints about the bodily functioning. You say that you have no libido, yet you can engage in sex. The obvious question arises: Do you become ‘aroused’ without any mental component (i.e. do you find yourself with an erection when a partner expresses some desire to engage in sex) or what? Do the sensations of sexual congress have a different quality than previously in the entity state? Would the idea of masturbation ever arise?

If a man touched your nipples or your lips or any other erogenous zone would you experience pleasure? And if so what does that imply? Does the fact that animal or man can arouse you mean that you are not heterosexually oriented as you said in some post where you were discussing your sex life and companionship? * How can you say you have any sexual orientation at all? Does the flesh and blood body called Richard have a preference companions that wear skirts and have smaller bone structure?


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