Actual Freedom – The Actual Freedom Mailing List Correspondence

Richard’s Correspondence

On The Actual Freedom Mailing List

With Correspondent No. 71


Continued from AF Mailing List, No 66

June 09 2004

RESPONDENT: What is the answer to the haietmoba?

RICHARD: In short ... it is an experiential answer.

To explain: the whole point of asking oneself, each moment again until it becomes a non-verbal attitude or a wordless approach to life, how one is experiencing this moment of being alive (the only moment one is ever alive) is to experientially ascertain just exactly what is the way or manner in which one is personally participating in the events which are occurring at this particular moment that one is alive ... after all, irregardless of whether one takes the back seat or not, we are all busy doing this business called being alive by the very fact of being a sentient creature known as a human being (with all that inheres in being and doing that).

Thus the answer to your query – what the answer is to asking how one is experiencing this moment of being alive – is dependent upon, on each occasion again, just exactly what the way or manner it is that one is personally participating in the occurrences which are currently happening.

RESPONDENT: Is it really superior?

RICHARD: As it is the only method so far (for as far as I have been able to verify) that has delivered the goods it has no peer ... obviously I cannot endorse any method which does not have a proven track-record.

July 09 2004

RESPONDENT: What is the answer to the haietmoba?

RICHARD: In short ... it is an experiential answer. To explain: the whole point of asking oneself, each moment again until it becomes a non-verbal attitude or a wordless approach to life, how one is experiencing this moment of being alive (the only moment one is ever alive) is to experientially ascertain just exactly what is the way or manner in which one is personally participating in the events which are occurring at this particular moment that one is alive ... after all, irregardless of whether one takes the back seat or not, we are all busy doing this business called being alive by the very fact of being a sentient creature known as a human being (with all that inheres in being and doing that). Thus the answer to your query – what the answer is to asking how one is experiencing this moment of being alive – is dependent upon, on each occasion again, just exactly what the way or manner it is that one is personally participating in the occurrences which are currently happening.

RESPONDENT: Thanks for your lucid answer ... if I find that I am not feeling good or so, I can’t always find out why it is so, and soon the picture of my feeling bad tends to get very complex ... should I: a) suppress all this complex thinking and focus on the moment and try to feel good this moment; b) find out exactly what is preventing me from feeling bad however complex it is.

RICHARD: This is how I have explained it in an earlier article:

• [Richard]: ‘... if ‘I’ am not feeling good then ‘I’ have something to look at to find out why. What has happened, between the last time ‘I’ felt good and now? When did ‘I’ feel good last? Five minutes ago? Five hours ago? What happened to end those felicitous feelings? Ahh ... yes: ‘He said that and I ...’. Or: ‘She didn’t do this and I ...’. Or: ‘What I wanted was ...’. Or: ‘I didn’t do ...’. And so on and so on ... one does not have to trace back into one’s childhood ... usually no more than yesterday afternoon at the most (‘feeling good’ is an unambiguous term – it is a general sense of well-being – and if anyone wants to argue about what feeling good means ... then do not even bother trying to do this at all). Once the specific moment of ceasing to feel good is pin-pointed, and the silliness of having such an incident as that (no matter what it is) take away one’s enjoyment and appreciation of this only moment of being alive is seen for what it is – usually some habitual reactive response – one is once more feeling good ... but with a pin-pointed cue to watch out for next time so as to not have that trigger off yet another bout of the same-old same-old. This is called nipping it in the bud before it gets out of hand ... with application and diligence and patience and perseverance one soon gets the knack of this and more and more time is spent enjoying and appreciating this moment of being alive. And, of course, once one does get the knack of this, one up-levels ‘feeling good’, as a bottom line each moment again, to ‘feeling happy and harmless’ ... and after that to ‘feeling perfect’ ...’.

Where you say you cannot always find out why it is so that you are not feeling good, and soon the picture of your feeling bad tends to get very complex, is the crux of the issue ... your subsequent queries (a) and (b) arise out of not tracing back to the last time you felt good (and thus pin-pointing what happened to end those felicitous/ innocuous feelings).

Put succinctly: the aim is to feel good right now – at this very moment – and, as you felt good previously, it is but a matter of finding out how come that general sense of well-being ceased happening.

RESPONDENT: Also, sometimes the ‘feeling bad’ comes in spikes ... I feel bad due to something and it is gone before I notice it ... should I poke it or leave it ...?

RICHARD: This is what that earlier article goes on to say:

• [Richard]: ‘ ... the more one enjoys and appreciates being just here right now – to the point of excellence being the norm – the greater the likelihood of a PCE happening ... a grim and/or glum person has no chance whatsoever of allowing the magical event, which indubitably shows where everyone has being going awry, to occur. Plus *any analysing and/or psychologising and/or philosophising whilst one is in the grip of debilitating feelings usually does not achieve much (other than spiralling around and around in varying degrees of despair and despondency or whatever) anyway*.
The wide and wondrous path to an actual freedom from the human condition is marked by enjoyment and appreciation – the sheer delight of being as happy and harmless as is humanly possible whilst remaining a ‘self’ – and the slightest diminishment of such felicity and innocuity is a warning signal (a flashing red light as it were) that one has inadvertently wandered off the way.
One is thus soon back on track ... and all because of everyday events. [emphasis added].

Thus as you are feeling good right now, at this very moment, and feeling bad ‘due to something’ has come and gone in a spike, then right now is the opportune moment to look at what that ‘something’ was – so as to pre-empt more of the same happening again – as feeling good is where clarity can flourish.

July 09 2004

RESPONDENT: Richard, how long do you think will it take before it becomes automatic to have the question running?

RICHARD: About as long as it takes to realise that feeling anything other than happy and harmless sucks ... and sucks big-time at that.

RESPONDENT: Would it be correct to say that the method is essentially same as increasing the present-time awareness?

RICHARD: No.

RESPONDENT: How soon will the rewards can be reaped by the method (in getting rid of the ‘me’) so that the momentum can be acquired by the success rather than the veracity/power of your words?

RICHARD: About as soon as it takes to realise that feeling anything other than happy and harmless sucks ... and sucks big-time at that.

RESPONDENT: [I am asking about your judgement in these cases ... also if possible to mention how quick it was in your case].

RICHARD: I have located the following text:

• [Richard]: ‘The first thing I did when I first stepped upon the wide and wondrous path to an actual freedom was to put an end to anger once and for all ... then ‘I’ was freed enough to live in a virtual freedom. It took ‘me’ about three weeks and I have never experienced anger since then. The first and crucial step was to say ‘YES’ to being here on earth, for ‘I’ located and identified that basic resentment that all people that I have spoken to have. To wit: ‘I didn’t ask to be born!’
This is why remembering a pure consciousness experience (PCE) is so important for success for it shows one, first hand, that freedom is already always here ... now. With the memory of that crystal-clear perfection held firmly in mind, that basic resentment vanishes forever, and then it is a relatively easy task to eliminate anger once and for all. One does this by neither expressing or repressing anger when an event happens that would previously trigger an outbreak. Anger is thus put into a bind, and the third alternative hoves into view, dispensing with the hostility that is a large part of ‘I’ the aggressive psychological entity, and gently ushering in an increasing ease and generosity of character. With this growing magnanimity, one becomes more and more anonymous, more and more selflessly motivated. With this expanding altruism one becomes less and less self-centred, less and less egocentric ... the humanitarian ideals of peace, kindness, caring, benevolence and humaneness become more and more evident as an actuality.
And all this while I asked ‘how am I experiencing this moment of being alive? ... and the essential character of the perfection of the physical infinitude of this material universe was enabled by ‘my’ concurrence. This enabling is experienced as a ‘pure intent’ running as a ‘golden thread’, as it were, from the purity and perfection of the PCE to that little-used faculty: naiveté (which is the closest one can get to innocence).

RESPONDENT: As a proponent in actual freedom, can you hazard any guess why the final event has not happened for Peter/Vineeto in spite of their understanding/ sincerity?

RICHARD: For the same reason why it has not happened for anybody else ... in the end all ‘I’ can do is procrastinate.

July 09 2004

RESPONDENT: Richard, is it possible to be typing this mail and parallely running the question ‘how am I experiencing this moment of being alive’?

RICHARD: It is more than just possible ... it is vital that it be run.

RESPONDENT: At least in the beginning days when I practice, won’t it interfere?

RICHARD: The article I referred to in a previous e-mail has this to say:

• [Richard]: ‘... it [the method] takes some doing to start off with, but as success after success starts to multiply exponentially, it becomes automatic to have this question running as an on-going thing (as a non-verbal attitude towards life ... a wordless approach each moment again) because it delivers the goods right here and now ... not off into some indeterminate future ...’.

RESPONDENT: Also, if I forget to run the question for half hour because I became involved in the mail, will the method cease to give its results?

RICHARD: It would appear you have answered this question already (immediately below).

RESPONDENT: I keep day-dreaming/ thinking and get into fears and anxieties ... my mind slips away from a simple state (awareness of the moment) to some complex state (memories, feelings, thoughts, recollections) and I get confused.

RICHARD: It is really very, very simple (which is possibly why it has never been discovered before this): one felt good previously; one is not feeling good now; something happened to one to end that felicitous/ innocuous feeling; one finds out what happened; one sees how silly that is (no matter what it was); one is once more feeling good.

RESPONDENT: As to how to go about resuming to apply actualism method ... I forget the purpose and I have to go through the rote of repeating myself why I am doing the whole stuff again to bring back to the ground state ... can you provide any help in my case?

RICHARD: Just listen to/watch a news bulletin and you will soon remember the purpose ... to wit: peace-on-earth, in this lifetime, as this flesh and blood body.

July 15 2004

RESPONDENT: I keep day-dreaming/thinking and get into fears and anxieties ... my mind slips away from a simple state (awareness of the moment) to some complex state (memories, feelings, thoughts, recollections) and I get confused.

RICHARD: It is really very, very simple (which is possibly why it has never been discovered before this): one felt good previously; one is not feeling good now; something happened to one to end that felicitous/ innocuous feeling; one finds out what happened; one sees how silly that is (no matter what it was); one is once more feeling good.

RESPONDENT No 23: What about when I find out what happened to end feeling good and I see that it is silly to keep worrying about it yet that doesn’t stop the worrying and I am not back to feeling good?

RICHARD: Two things immediately leap to mind ... (1) you value feeling worry (a feeling of anxious concern) over feeling good (a general sense of well-being) ... and (2) you have not really seen it is silly to feel bad (a general sense of ill-being). What I would suggest, at this point, is to feel the silliness of feeling bad (in this case feeling anxiety) ... then the seeing (as in a realisation) might very well have the desired effect (as in an actualisation) of once more feeling good.

RESPONDENT: a) I am not able to see the silliness of feeling bad ...

RICHARD: Do you comprehend that, although the past was actual when it was happening, it is not actual now and that, although the future will be actual when it does happen, it is not actual now ... that only this moment is actual?

If so, do you further comprehend that anytime you felt good/will feel good does not mean a thing if you are not feeling good now ... that a remembered occasion/an anticipated occasion pales into insignificance if you are feeling bad now?

Furthermore, do you understand that to be living this moment – the only moment you are ever alive – by feeling bad is to be frittering away a vital opportunity to be fully alive ... to totally enjoy and appreciate being what you indubitably are (a sensate creature) whilst you are here on this planet?

If so, is it not silly to waste this only moment you are ever alive by feeling bad ... when you could be feeling good?

RESPONDENT: ... feeling bad seems to be the driving force for doing various things like laundry, which I am not interested in – and the only way feeling bad goes away is by doing it ... not by seeing the silliness of it ... am I missing something here?

RICHARD: Maybe an example will provide the clue: back in 1981, in the early days of starting on the wide and wondrous path to an actual freedom from the human condition, I was standing in the kitchen of my ex-farmhouse, situated on a couple of acres of land in a remote countryside location, washing the breakfast dishes; I was not interested in washing the dishes/I had never been interested in washing the dishes; I did not like washing the dishes/I had never liked washing the dishes; washing the dishes was an uninteresting chore, an unlikeable task, that just had to be done (otherwise I would not be doing it/would never had done it/would never do it) ... and all the while the early-morning sun was streaming in through the large glass windows, in the eastern wall to my front, beckoning me, enticing me to hurry-up and get the uninteresting and unlikeable job over and done with so that I could scamper outside and get stuck into doing the interesting things I really liked doing/wanted to do.

Howsoever, the tool for facilitating the actualism method – asking oneself, each moment again, how one is experiencing this moment of being alive (the only moment one is ever alive) – had by now become a non-verbal approach to life, a wordless attitude towards being alive, and all-of-a-sudden, whilst standing there with my hands in the sink being anywhere but here, at anytime but now, it was a delight and a joy to be doing exactly what it was I was already doing anyway ... standing in the golden sunlight with hands immersed in delicious, tingling-to-the-touch, hot soapy water.

I find myself looking at what the hands are feeling (the hot soapy water) and become aware I have never seen hot soapy water before – have never really seen hot soapy water before – and become fascinated with the actuality of what is happening: it is as if the hands know what to do without any input from me; they are reaching for a plate, they are applying the scourer appropriately, they are turning the plate over, they are applying the scourer appropriately, they are lifting the cleaned plate out of the washing sink; they are dipping it into the rinsing sink; they are placing it in the rack to drip ... and all this while they are feeling the delicious tingling sensation of hot soapy water as it strips-away the grease and other detritus.

I am not required at all; I am a supernumerary; I am redundant; I can retire, fold in my hand, pack in the game, depart, disappear, dissolve, disintegrate, vamoose, vanish, die – whatever – and life would manage quite well, thank you, without me ... a whole lot better, in fact, as I am holding up the works from functioning smoothly.

‘I’ was not needed ... ‘my’ services were no longer required.

RESPONDENT: Sometimes I find myself in a conflicting situation where I don’t want to do things yet I don’t want to face the consequences.

b) So is the method very much ‘nipping in the bud’?

RICHARD: At this stage the method is held-up by not being able to see the silliness of feeling bad. Vis.:

• [Respondent]: ‘I am not able to see the silliness of feeling bad ...’.

RESPONDENT: c) Is there any analysis involved?

RICHARD: At this stage any analysis is held-up by not being able to see the silliness of feeling bad. Vis.:

• [Respondent]: ‘I am not able to see the silliness of feeling bad ...’.

RESPONDENT: d) Due to associative memory, when I feel bad (maybe I didn’t catch it early on), what I see inside me is a complex web of images. I have not been able to look at it clearly, let alone understand it. Can you provide any insight?

RICHARD: Yes ... you are unable, at this stage, to see the silliness of feeling bad. Vis.:

• [Respondent]: ‘I am not able to see the silliness of feeling bad ...’.

RESPONDENT: e) The ‘feeling bad’ with its images from the past seems to paralyse any investigation; any help?

RICHARD: Yes ... you are unable, at this stage, to see the silliness of feeling bad. Vis.:

• [Respondent]: ‘I am not able to see the silliness of feeling bad ...’.

July 15 2004

RESPONDENT: If the realization that ‘feeling bad’ is silly dawns on oneself, is it necessary to find why one is feeling bad? In other words, can the method be ‘realize that feeling bad sucks and then apply this realization’ ... ?

RICHARD: The article I referred to in a previous e-mail has this to say:

• [Richard]: ‘... once the specific moment of ceasing to feel good is pin-pointed, and the silliness of having such an incident as that (no matter what it is) take away one’s enjoyment and appreciation of this only moment of being alive is seen for what it is – usually some habitual reactive response – one is once more feeling good ... but *with a pin-pointed cue to watch out for next time so as to not have that trigger off yet another bout of the same-old same-old. This is called nipping it in the bud before it gets out of hand* ... with application and diligence and patience and perseverance one soon gets the knack of this and more and more time is spent enjoying and appreciating this moment of being alive ...’. [emphasis added].

August 15 2004

RESPONDENT: a) I am not able to see the silliness of feeling bad ...

RICHARD: Do you comprehend that, although the past was actual when it was happening, it is not actual now and that, although the future will be actual when it does happen, it is not actual now ... that only this moment is actual? If so, do you further comprehend that anytime you felt good/will feel good does not mean a thing if you are not feeling good now ... that a remembered occasion/an anticipated occasion pales into insignificance if you are feeling bad now? Furthermore, do you understand that to be living this moment – the only moment you are ever alive – by feeling bad is to be frittering away a vital opportunity to be fully alive ... to totally enjoy and appreciate being what you indubitably are (a sensate creature) whilst you are here on this planet? If so, is it not silly to waste this only moment you are ever alive by feeling bad ... when you could be feeling good?

(snip)

RESPONDENT: Thanks Richard, this was great. I am working on it, and there is great success already i.e I now see the silliness of feeling bad. I suspect that there might be such blockages for other people too ... the method is so simple but one needs to take it, understand it so thoroughly and absorb it so that it becomes automatic. Your pointer was crucial.

I have some doubts regarding the term ‘Human Condition’ ... you say: [quote] ‘The Human Condition is a term that refers to the situation that all human beings find themselves in when they emerge here as babies. The term refers to the contrary and perverse nature of all peoples of all races and all cultures’. [endquote]. I don’t see the relation between the two sentences ... does the term mean the worldview prior to ‘human conditioning’ (which I understand)?

RICHARD: No … the term means the (intrinsic) state of being prior to human conditioning.

RESPONDENT: Is ‘human nature’ an equivalent term?

RICHARD: Yes … as in such popular expressions as ‘you can’t change human nature’.

RESPONDENT: [quote] ‘There is ‘good’ and ‘bad’ in everyone ... all humans have a ‘dark side’ to their nature and a ‘light side’. [endquote]. The ‘good’ people (observing from outside) seem to be well behaved in most of the circumstances and show no/little signs of ‘bad’ ... I am at a loss validating this statement (unless I use my own self).

RICHARD: Such terms refer to the affective impulses characterised, for the sake of simplicity, as malice and sorrow (the ‘dark side’) and their antidotal pacifiers love and compassion (the ‘light side’): as I am yet to see, hear about, or read of, someone – anyone – who shows no sign whatsoever of being malicious and sorrowful (and being loving and compassionate is a sure sign) I do look askance at your observation.

August 15 2004

RESPONDENT: Apart from practising the method diligently, how much intellectual understanding would you recommend for success? I ask this because a lot of statements in the website need a lot of resources from me for validation and I wonder if it is needed for success or all will become clear as time progresses?

RICHARD: I have located the following:

• [Richard]: ‘Speaking personally, I did not know of any research on this subject when I started to actively investigate the human condition in myself 20 or more years ago: as I intimately explored the depths of ‘being’ it became increasingly and transparently obvious that the instinctual passions – the source of ‘self’ – were the root cause of all the ills of humankind.
It was the journey of a lifetime!
(...) I make no pretensions whatsoever of being a biologist – I am a lay-person dabbling in an ad hoc general reading of the subject – and I have no personal need for an interest in biology at all (since I began reporting my experience to my fellow human beings I have had to find out about all manner of things).

And:

• [Richard]: ‘Since I began reporting my experience to my fellow human beings I have needed to find out about all manner of things. My way of becoming free was simple:
I stepped out of the ‘real world’ into this actual world and left ‘myself’ behind where ‘I’ belonged.

And:

• [Co-Respondent]: ‘… I am taking 10 mg of Seroxat, is a medicine belonging in the SSRI family, like Prozac, I am sure you know them.
• [Richard]: ‘Nope ... I simply looked the topic up, for my last e-mail to you, and copy-pasted the names and side-effects into a paragraph of my own making.
I have had to learn about all manner of things since going public with my discovery.

There are more but maybe that will do for now.

August 15 2004

RESPONDENT: Richard, a) actualism is experiencing that matter is not merely passive ... what does it mean?

RICHARD: Another way of saying it is that actualism is the direct experience that matter is not inert.

RESPONDENT: If you have a stone in your hand (matter), it is passive right?

RICHARD: Only in the real-world.

RESPONDENT: b) pure intent is a palpable force that is a connection between the universe and oneself ... what is a connection? Is it conceptual, psychological, affective or physical?

RICHARD: Physical.

Continued on AF Mailing List, No 66


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