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Others ~ Selected Correspondence Altered State of Consciousness
I remember when the bubble burst and a few seconds before the full-blown ASC, that there was no distance between an ‘educated’, ‘rich’, ‘young’, ‘athletic’ and ‘interesting’ me and a ‘humble’, ‘poor’, ‘aged’, ‘fat’ and ‘boring’ countryside neighbour... the people and things suddenly were perfect as they were and very interesting and life a very engaging experience to live no matter who/what. As there was no distance and everything was perfect as it was, consequently there was no place for God to fit in the scheme. It’s called an experience of intimacy as the usual distance and background fear we always experience in regards to the world suddenly vanish. If Richard is living this experience 24 h/day, well, he lives on another planet altogether. This experience is in contrast to the ASC where there’s seemingly no distance between the observer and the observed, but in the sense that ‘I’ am the observed, the subject and the object of experience become one. This happens when ‘I’ pollute the experience of consciousness with my residual presence and thus ‘I’ wrongly experience myself as being consciousness, resulting in the inability to differentiate between myself and what I am conscious of: ‘I am the world and the World is Me’ (aka God). Because of that, spirituality invariably leads one towards solipsism. In order to bypass this, the self needs to disintegrate in its totality.... any remnants, and the possibility remains open for the contamination of consciousness (I equate the freed consciousness with ‘my’ presence). There can never be a ‘pure’ experience of consciousness while any fragments of ‘me’ are still in existence. No 32, 10.5.2005
For me, this first time experience is still outstanding because, unlike all of the subsequent experiences, I was naively unaware that the experience was temporary – unaware that it would end. Nowadays the contrast between a PCE and my normal state – being virtually free of malice and sorrow – is nowhere near as great as it was during my first PCE and I have tended to spend a good deal of my PCE times taking the opportunity of exploring the human condition from the outside as it were. This almost casual wandering in and out of PCEs, combined with a far less substantial ‘self’ has sometimes meant that the distinction between my normal experiencing and a pure consciousness experiencing becomes so blurred as to be almost indistinct. What always alerts me to the distinction, however, is that when ‘I’ am present it is as though there is a thin veil between ‘me’ and the purity, perfection and physical vitality of the actual world – usually a slightly grey veil given that sorrow is the predominant human affliction. Because of this, I always maintain my first substantive PCE as my loadstone – because that experience was so unexpected, and therefore so unique, that there was neither reason nor opportunity for ‘me’ and my guile to claim it as ‘mine’. It’s just my way of avoiding straying off the path – of maintaining a pure intent and avoiding the trap of falling into delusion. I have no doubt that because I had been warned in advance of the lure of self-aggrandizing ASCs following in the wake of a PCE, I did not experience such myself. I could easily see how PCEs could lead to ASCs, and because I had had many ASCs, I could experientially discern the difference between these two states. And the difference is huge. But, perhaps unlike yourself, I had the idea in the back of my mind that a PCE would be temporary, and that at some point there would be a return to the usual care-worn, ‘real world’ state. So you might say that this was rather expected, although I can see that it might be better if one places no expectations whatever on the experience. Gary to Peter
But given that this is a brand new process it is essential to be wary of the traps of lapsing back into the old spiritual well-worn patterns. Richard pasted a bit out of my journal recently about period I passed through where the lust for power and Guru-ship instinctually kicked in. As I remember it, it was soon after this that I realized that I was in danger of lapsing into being an experience-junkie as is common with spiritual people. I remember going through months and months wanting an experience that would get me out of here, be a sign, or give me relief from boredom, frustration, fear or whatever other feeling was dominant at the time. Pure consciousness experiences are not ‘mine’ to claim, they serve only to be a guide for what is possible 24 hrs. a day, everyday – upon ‘my’ demise. It is the relentless, incessant work done that brings an end to malice and sorrow, not the chasing of experiences or the experience itself. . PCEs will sneak up on you anyway, and then the important thing is to mine them for information and to remember the experience afterwards. What I would do is take notes during a PCE to aid my memory afterwards when I returned to ‘normal’ afterwards. This makes a good deal of sense. ‘I’ want to claim these experiences as ‘mine’, to my greater glory and self-aggrandizement. I have become aware of that starry-eyed, slightly dopey look of the Altered State of Consciousness, you know, that ga-ga expression on the face, when having an excellence experience, that signals that one is off track. I don’t know if describing it this way is accurate. One is then in danger of lapsing into Love Agape and Divine Compassion. I have not tried the technique of taking notes during a PCE. My description of the magical dancing snowflakes experience is the first I have written of this. I shall have to try this in the future and see what happens. Gary to Peter
It was a classic story, common to many. A period of loneliness and depression, an experience of personal loss or grief, a life-changing experience and a life born again as a Saviour – by whatever name, for whatever cause. What was of most interest to me in Goodall’s case was her description of what appeared to be a pure consciousness experience, her after-the-fact interpretation of the experience as a mystical experience and that she then went on to claim the experience as ‘her’ own – as being a personal revelation from God. A human being’s imaginative faculty is carefully nurtured and hurried along in childhood through nursery rhymes, fables, stories of all kinds, and the belief in the supernatural, the mystical, and the otherworldly is the result. It is not surprising, then, that people hurry to interpret a perfection experience in the framework that they are most comfortable with – as a mystical, otherworldly experience, or as a frank communication from God himself. There are several aspects to this tendency. Firstly, there is a long, long tradition of mystical experiences, both in Eastern and Western religions, so much so that to feel oneself to be God, or to feel oneself to be a specially chosen friend of the creator God, is but the status quo. Secondly, given that human experience is universally deemed to be a battle between good and evil, every experience is automatically classified as either good or evil … and a PCE is invariably interpreted as being in the ‘good’ or Godly camp. Yes, this seems to be an extension of the tendency to regard every happy occasion ... and a PCE is certainly a ‘happy occasion’ as either luck, as in ‘thanking my lucky stars’, good fortune, or a direct communication from a benevolent God or Goddess ‘up there’. Conversely, pain, misery, and suffering is regarded as ‘misfortune’, ‘bad luck’, or even Divine punishment. Underlying this social/historic programming are the instinctual survival passions – passions which are non-existent in a PCE but are given full reign in any altered state of consciousness experience. This means there is a powerful instinctive lure to claim any and all experience as ‘mine’. The reason I point this out is that not only has an actualist to be wary of the spiritual programming that actively encourages the pursuit of altered states of consciousness, but also of the crude instinctive narcissistic drive that has thus far always corrupted the human search for freedom, peace and happiness. And I would hasten to add that the ‘pursuit of altered states of consciousness’ does not necessarily always mean the hankering after religious experiences. The use of mood-altering drugs is often a case in point. It could be a simple everyday thing like stopping off in the tavern for a few drinks or smoking a few joints after work. What makes it the craving for an altered state of consciousness is that it is ‘me’ looking for an escape from normal, everyday ‘reality’. Also, there may be the desire for other ‘out of body’ experiences, as through meditative practices and such. The pursuit of altered states of consciousness is impelled by the same instinctual survival passions that make life on this verdant planet boring and lacklustre for so many people. Gary to Peter
I took a peak at the link you provided (http://64.225.88.61/kdocs.htm) and while I hardly have the time or the inclination to read it all, I did ‘enjoy’ skimming through it, although not for the same reasons I used to enjoy reading K writings. Of course, what you provided was ‘early’ Krishnamurti, and I see it is not long after his completion of the ‘process’ (about 6 years in fact), that mystical opening of the Third Eye and kundalini energy described in the Mary Lutyens book ‘Krishnamurti: The Years of Awakening’ (1975). The reason I ‘enjoyed’ reading some of it was that it took me no time at all to locate passages which leave their unmistakable spiritual imprint and place Krishnamurti undeniably in the mystical/spiritual camp, despite his avid denials in later years. Take for instance this passage, off of page 12:
While the excerpt is off of page 12, one would not have to look that far to find those silly capitalized words, ie. Truth, Being, Beauty, etc. I still cannot believe that I once eagerly lapped up this nonsense. When I first approached the Actual Freedom writings, I thought that Richard was being too strident in blaming all the enlightened beings down through history for all the wars, misery, torture, rapes, etc. I thought this was certainly going too far, and that there must still be something ‘good’ in these spiritual teachings, or in the teachers themselves. After a little while longer, it became evident to me that I was still hanging onto the tattered threads of my spiritual beliefs and that I still did not want to abandon my spiritual teachers. But I no longer think thusly. One of the things I enjoy nowadays is being able to see clearly the lie of Enlightenment. I enjoy having the discernment to see that Krishnamurti, while his readings are interesting, belongs in the same camp with all the snake-charmers, charlatans, preachers, God-men, and God-women down through history. To my mind, he is not different from some back-country evangelical preacher preaching to his congregation in a tidewater chapel. I do indeed enjoy having the intelligence nowadays to question the validity of what he is talking about. It is satisfying to be able to see through his sermons. I think if you are a spiritualist yourself (and there are some indications that that is so), you will no doubt enjoy reading K, but for quite different reasons. Gary to No 44 Design ©The Actual Freedom Trust: 1997-. All Rights Reserved. |
